October 17th, 2016 | Breanne Eckleberry
A few weeks ago, I was sitting on the couch watching a movie with my boyfriend’s daughter; she’s 8 and she’s absolutely his little mini-me. We had just gotten done eating lunch when she turned to me and said,” You know Breanne, if you and my dad get married that would make you my step-mom…” I could barely get words out when she said “But it doesn’t matter, I already consider you that anyway.” Now please hold while I go bawl my eyes out!
Dating someone with children is one of the scariest things I’ve ever done. There is this tiny human that could potentially hate you, think you want to replace her mother, not listen to you or respect you, never want to be around you, maybe put glue or something in your shampoo. (I’ve seen movies about this, I know how it usually turns out!)
Every weekend you have to provide and share six meals, guidance and entertainment. You have to be a role model; someone this child can love and respect. You have to set boundaries and realize that it’s ok if you say no ice cream before dinner. You have to stay in bed with her until she falls asleep because she doesn’t want to go to bed alone. But most of all you have to show her unconditional love and support.
When all of these things come together you end up with gestures like this. A picture that it took her no more than 10 minutes to draw but will stay in your heart for a lifetime.
Children are the most honest of any age group. They have no problem telling you when your cooking sucks or when your hair is mess. They also have no problem letting you know they love you. All of those “just because” hugs and “I drew this picture for you” moments can make anyone’s heart melt. When you win your way into a child’s heart, it’s the most rewarding of all.
Now here I am, running errands with an 8 year that actually wants to go food shopping with me. Sometimes thinking back, it’s hard to believe that I was ever afraid of this. I occasionally get the uncomfortable “Are you and my dad going to have a baby?” questions because she wants a little brother, but I always get that pure, innocent love that can only come from a child.
Not only is the child’s love itself rewarding, but the love you have for your man goes so much deeper. There’s something about a man with a child that just gets your heart beating a little bit faster. Seeing this big tough guy melt at the site of this little person. Seeing the love that he gives her and knowing there is absolutely nothing in the world he wouldn’t do for his daughter. There is such a special bond between a father and a daughter and when you get accepted into their family it’s something truly special.
Having children of my own was always up in the air for me. Growing up, I always assumed that I would have kids just because that’s what you’re supposed to do. Then as I got older I thought less and less about it until I swore children just weren’t for me. Everyone always told me that when I met the right person I would realize that I do want children of my own. I always brushed them off because I “knew” that I wouldn’t.
Turns out, all it takes is the right man and the love from his daughter and BAM, your entire world and all your ideas of your life change.